Dear Amazon,
you have spoiled me so extensively with your free two day shipping and while I have always felt honored to be a Prime member, now actual postage and packaging that goes through regular shipping seems antiquated to me.
I forgot my room key at home — it’s always something extremely important and irreplaceable that I forget. It’s nothing I need right away, just a minor inconvenience I have to work around — and I had the conscious thought of “Oh, wait, I can get Amazon to ship it for free in two days. I’ll have it by tomorrow and my parents won’t have to pay anything to send it to me.”
I eventually figured out that is impossible but I was just wondering if you could make an exception anyway based on the principal that I’m a fine ass human being and that I spent the whole contents of my bank account buying things on your website for the Christmas rush.
You’ll note I did not overdraft which means I’m responsible and capable of elementary math — though I sometimes fail at those new captchas that ask me to solve multiplication tables; third grade was a hard year for me — and worthy of this treatment.
Think about it,
Your Admirable Preferred Customer
Danielle A. Desmond
